Wow, you really read that stuff ...???
But, you are CORRECT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The tech descrips are ...
Dumber than "Forrest Gump"
Thank Yosh for the mouse click ...

they are MEANT TO BE HUMEROUS. self-deprecating humor is what it's called in this instance. even the most straightforward of them really doesn't quite make the standards of 'hard sci-fi'. is it that important to you that it doesn't? if so i suppose there is nothing stopping you from fixing that yourself, that way you guarentee that it meets your expectations. but please don't start a thread about how you can't have ship to ship combat at warp speeds or anything like that. if you want it to be perfectly consistent, utterly scientifically correct, invariably serious you WILL have to do it yourself or recruit a group of likeminded folks(good luck with that) to mod it. hell, i just might download it myself for shits and giggles

Porcupine,

Actually, the only assertion I thought one could reasonably garner from my comment was that I believe the flavour surrounding the technology takes away from the atmosphere of the game.

Regarding the above, I was also being generous. Grammatical errors aside, I get the feeling that some of this text was rushed out the door; it feels tacked on at best.

Sorry BoomFrog,
But anything that is so bad ...
Well, IT IS SO BAD ...
and that does NOT equal funny ...
Try again ...

I think the tech descriptions are hilarious, espesially space weapions i think itis. Space is dangerous to the extreame, if you go out in it, you will die. If you build a hollow metal ball to wade around in it, you will come across others in their hollow metal balls trying to kill you.

I enjoy 'em myself. Not in a class with Shakespeare's comedy, but it's an entertaining change of pace.

And, frankly, it helps to keep the game light-hearted. I guess it's just a stylistic thing.

Who's to say that the media on 26th Century Earth don't have a smart-aleck, tongue-in-cheek style? I mean, really now, if we can suspend disbelief around FTL travel and the proximity of life forms in such a small volume of space...

This isn't supposed to be a "truely realistic" space empire management simulation game (SPEESIG). Anyway, only the lower-class techs are self deprecating. Ttends to be a bit more sophisticated humor in the upper tiers of the technology tree, and most of the weapons descriptions are actually relatively technical. They do a good job of the sci-fi weapons and technology - part of what makes it so good are the allusions they throw in to some of the most famous sci-fi books/movies. And while a lot of it might seem borrowed from Star Trek, they do a good job of describing the technology it laymen's terms; Disruptor class weapons might seem unplausible and first, but the methods described in its manufacture (specialized crystals that focus energy and whatnot) make the game more believable on a whole.

Besides, its the Galactic News, not the Imperial Center for Science and Research

well, as to grammer and so forth...

they will just have to take the bullet on that one

and i DO appreciate the attitude more then the comedic skill. but can you really expect them to hire a comedic genius on their budget? not like they are on an EA budget or anything

The game is totally moddable, Feel free to create your own tech descriptions. Heck, I'll even write the one for shields for you!

"Shields are a direct evolution from Deflectors insofar that they use phased energy pulses to nullify the effects of energy weapons, But now by using the Vincent Quantum-Induction principle we have managed to create a constant cohesive energy field around the hull of a starship."

Good enough? All you need to do is look in the game folders and you should find something like techfiles.xml or something...

Kinda like in Diablo II where the programers did the voices for the cow level. They were so bad they were hilarious.

Moo. Moo, moomoomoo, moomoo, moo! Moo, moo. MOOooOO!

I find that they add to the charm of the title.

I think the tech descriptions are hilarious. (I also like how the default ships all have movie quotes as descriptions.) They'd be dumb if you read them every time you played the game, but so would you, for that matter. ... Hmm, the smiley button isn't working for me. Meh, insert wink here.

"Now the aliens working in our factories will actually be aliens. Get it? Oh the wit!"

Edit: Though I am miffed about the descriptions for Subspace Blasters & Annihilators, as they tell me I'm going to be getting good lasers--despite that Blasters are bugged and Annihilators don't even exist. (Insert angry-looking smiley here.)

Those tech descriptions are great. Get a life.

Airtight argument, silpheed.