Humans don't seem to allow me to choose starting tech. One thing I noticed is that I always used to start with universal translator on my friends computer, but on mine, I seem to have to research it. I was looking for a way to get that back, but i've yet to find it. I'm not sure how he set that up.
You're about to discover the joy of playing a custom race.
You only get 200tp of starting techs, which is less than most if not all the stock races, but you do get to choose them yourself. Custom races also get 15 customization points rather than the 8-10 that stock races get, although customs have no inherent (i.e. free) bonuses. But it's still better from the point of view of playing the way you want to play; after all, the Korx +trade and +trade route bonuses are useless in the eyes of almost everyone, no matter how many points they're theoretically worth.
Is it worth buying colony ships, or should I just wait for the construction turnaround. I've experimented with both, and honestly can't decide which works better. I guess I've been paying too much attention to other things.
Rush buy cost is [cost ^ 1.1 * 6], which comes to in the range of ~9x the construction value in that stage of the game, so you're better off waiting for them to build. You might consider planting some factories on your homeworld to get them to build faster, though. Oh, and design a new colony ship. The default one has range modules on it, which you'll almost never need, and very early in the game you can put ion drives and/or impulse drives (hint: make this a priority tech, as it gives a passive +1 speed) on them instead of the default hyperdrive.
You may also want to consider building colony modules on small or tiny hulls, but to do smalls you'll need interstellar construction in TA, whereas for tinies you'll need 25% miniaturization (basic is 10% and enhanced is another 15%). This isn't necessary below a medium galaxy, though, and is debateable even there.
You haven't answered what galaxy size you're on, or how many opponents you're competing with for the admittedly few planets that the default settings will produce.
You don't need customization points spent in diplomacy; it's far better to tech your way to the bonuses if you intend to play musical technology chairs with the AI (also referred to as tech whoring and tech pimping, among other things). Personally, I primarily use a mix of research, military production, and speed. I find it difficult to ignore the 10% morale for 1 point, so I generally get that as well.
As for your other question, I'm one of many. 