His Majesty's Sloop Sophie
At sea

The Rt. Hon. Lord Keith, K.B., etc., ctc.
Admiral of the Blue.

My Lord,
I am to beg you will be pleased to order a Court Martial to be held on Isaac Wilson (seaman) belonging to the Sloop I have the honour to Command for having committed the unnatural Crime of Sodomy on a Goat, in the Goathouse, on the evening of March 16th.

I have the Honour to remain, my Lord,

Your Lordship's most obedient very humble servant



'It is odd how the law always harps upon the unnaturalness of sodomy,' observed Stephen. 'Though I know at least two judges who are paederasts; and of course barristers . . . What will happen to him?'

'Oh, he'll be hanged. Run up at the yard-arm, and boats attending from every ship in the fleet.'

'That seems a little extreme.'

'Of course it is. Oh, what an infernal bore - witnesses going over to the flagship by the dozen, days lost . . . The Sophie a laughing-stock. Why will they report these things? The goat must be slaughtered - that's but fair - and it shall be served out to the mess that informed on him.'

'Could you not set them both ashore - on separate shores, if you have strong feelings on the moral issue - and sail quietly away?'

'Well,' said Jack, whose anger had died down. 'Perhaps there is something in what you propose. A dish of tea? You take milk, sir?'

'Goat's milk, sir?'

'Why, I suppose it is.'

'Perhaps without milk, then, if you please. . . '

Has Stardock finally worked this out? Or is there something in the FF update? Just curious.