Either you're all lying, or I'm doing something wrong (I'm willing to bet on the second, though

). I've created a really strong military faction and expanding like crazy. Or at least trying to - in almost every game, I NEVER find more than the first two habitable planets that are always in the starting system (by the way, Stardock, would you mind randomizing it a bit? starting with a 10 and 4/3 planets all the time is getting a tad repetitive, don't you agree?). And if I do find some habitable planets, they're already colonized or are right next to a different race. Why aren't they right next to me? I've chosen "lucky" and it doesn't help. I only get a nice habitable planet about 1 every 6 or 7 games. A few suggestions would be nice, thanks.
And besides, without any technology (I'm pumping fighters like crazy), I'm getting my ass kicked. I destroy their ships, but when I invade or they invade, my army is creamed, since I lack the proper technology to defeat them, even with a good soldiering bonus. What can I do to balance their technology edge? Or was I attacking too early? And please don't tell me to trade for techs, my diplomacy is pathetic, I can't trade a million bucks for a cup of coffee.