It really sounds like you need to put more resources in research. If your allies are ahead in technology they have likely researched faster propulsion for their ships.
Your allies also know how to use money to get many colony ships fast. Join them, you should buy many colony ships in the first turns of the game. Your survey ships should bring in enough cash to do so.
For social improvements, my start planet often has a mix of everything (manufacturing, economy, research), I specialize further planets, so I have a manufacturing planet, a research planet, a money-making planet.
Level 0 planets cannot be colonized in Dread Lords. In Dark Avatar, you can research additional colonization technologies so you can colonize in Master of Orion style.