Secret Literary Diary of Malte

Reply to Question for the wise people in Blogging JoeUser Forums

Thanks guys for your advice. I really appreciate it. You guys are wise and nice:)

Question for the wise people in Blogging JoeUser Forums

I need a help from the mankind. I still believe in kindness of the People. So I expect some guidance from the wise and sympathetic souls. Question is: I feel completely dead inside. What should I do. Any suggestions? Sincerely, Me

Writing of no importance in Philosophy JoeUser Forums

My writing is just a writing of no importance. That's obvious and there is no question about it. What one can write to really feel that he had done something what has any meaning to the world. If it was about money, government, sports, politics , or male-female games and struggles, oh, this maybe would have that sacred meaning. But my writing has no meaning , theref

I HAVE NO ILLUSIONS, I LOST THEM ON MY TRAVELS in Writing JoeUser Forums

I am in the starting point. Again. Enough of people, and those shady relationships with them. Enough. It makes me weak. I am so susceptible for people influence. Why they are so cruel to me, with their hands, with their smiles, with they sweet words, with their admiration to me. I have no defenses. Cruel fakers. Sleazy mental perverseness. That's their constitu

Sadness of the stranger in Home & Family JoeUser Forums

Stranger between Russians , stranger between Americans. Whenever I go, I'm the only one, the unique one, the stranger. Whenever I go I have an accent, whenever I go I feel inside of me. Although, i like them , and they like me,/ some of them even too much/ Russians are awesome, / for now/, Americans are O.K, I feel deep sadness today. Everyday afraid that they c

Decision and Hondas Civic in Current Events JoeUser Forums

Hello I don't know what happened but I just decided to stop being brainless anymore. It's getting boring already. Just watched "River's edge". Keane like always bad, bad, bad, boring, bad , whatever. The movie itself medium, some scenes definitely too long without any meaning/ esp. with Keanu, they should cut him a little/ but CRISPIN GLOV

I'm back-strange in Blogging JoeUser Forums

First, what i want to say is: I don't understand why i can't upload images into my blog anymore. I don't like it this way. It doesn't work anymore--maybe now I'm doing something incorect, but I don't think so. Would be grateful if somebody tell me what's wrong. I need the images and photos here. Desperately. Second, it is kind of tiring to check if my

FEAR in Blogging JoeUser Forums

I'm afraid. I'm in the panic. Can't sleep, can't do anything. Now I want to do everything just to escape from this fear, from this panic. Where are you??? Where are you??? I'm waiting forth day, looking at doors, if anybody from you will come, if you will come You know, that your eyes, are burning me like a fire, when i'm looking in your eyes, t

Confusion in Marital Issues JoeUser Forums

Have you ever been in the middle of the real confusion??? I'm there again, and again. Every day deeper and deeper the confusion drags me in. Drags me in into a mud. I'm not a bad person. Despite of that what everybody thinks. I'm scared. Every day more and more scared. They use to say with a big, perky confidence--there is always a solution- but here, in my

CHANGE in Misc JoeUser Forums

I'm going to do that. i don't know how , but I will. I will get what I want from life. Why not me. I made my mind. No more time for writing. Good bye admin.Selfish ignorant who knows nothing about literature. Don't be so serious in your life, it will kill you. Do you know what irony or caricature is? I don't think so. And don't watch to much American movies. It s

Reply to STORY in Art JoeUser Forums

BECAUSE OF WHAT?? I thought it was a free country, right?

"My" area in Travel JoeUser Forums

Nothing here is mine. Nothing here is mine. Everything is so far away from me as if it doesn't exist at all. The house I live in, the streets I walk, the people I talk to. Everything seems to be just an vague illusion, like a half-existences, like ghosts. Ghost-houses, ghost-streets, ghost-trees, ghost-people. Even food is not real, even the food is just a ghos

Celebration in Religion JoeUser Forums

Eh, enough of this gloomy atmosphere. Everybody has enough of it, eeeeverybody. Everybody hates me now- probably--so let's make a little twist. I'm doing well, very well, althought there is a dead bird in my backyard, dead bird without a head, actually, to be descriptive I have to say--he has a head, but only a half of the head. There is a dead body

STORY in Art JoeUser Forums

-You are living in a dream-- he said. - Life is a fight- now said he. Yes, we are living in a dream. Let's face it. Let's admit it. Don't accuse them. Don't deny that. It's not their fault. On the right side they-- on the left side us. -It's pretty sad today, don't you think honey??- she asked and he nodded slowly. -There is a barrier

Reply to Provocation in Gaming JoeUser Forums

Cactoblasta-- /whatever does it mean/ .I wish too, I'm kind of foreign. I could even say--I'm extremely foreign.

Reply to Provocation in Gaming JoeUser Forums

Marcathonas-- I don't do drugs. Just the tea drinking, as I said. Why you are so suspicious??

Provocation in Gaming JoeUser Forums

Today I decided to try a little provocation. Just to provoke a little. I'm not sure how to do it , of course. I won't tell anything-- just will go to sleep with a slight hope, that somone will be able to read between my verses. Just a little hope, no expectations. Not really believe that, not really believe. One shouldn't expect to much of course, especia

Just love, nothing more or less in Sex & Romance JoeUser Forums

Everything I want to tell you, I can't tell you. Close in the dark bottle forever. Set me free please, regardless of the danger, regardless of catastrophy. I'm taking all those pils I can find in my empty house, to get rid of this pain. I'm eating, I'm reading, I'm watching, I'm listening, I'm talking, I'm drinking, day in and day out. Nothing changes. Still e

Reason in Life JoeUser Forums

OK, there must be a reason. In this case, there must be. I use to believe, througout my whole life, there were no reasons. No reasons at all. But this case, this one particular case makes me sure-- there must be a reason--and there is a reason. But I don't know what kind of reason of course. That would be great to know what kind of reason, that would be really

PLEASE in Personal Relationships JoeUser Forums

Please, I can' t stand it anymore.Please, take it from me. Can' t stand it anymore, please take it away from me. Why you did it. Why you entered. Why you did this, why. Yes, you can stay wih him forever--he is so strong,so masculine, so manly. You don't really like him, bu you like his power over you, you like his ugly man body, you like his deep, masculine

MORNING,Hangover and relanium in Current Events JoeUser Forums

I'ts bright and everything is singing. I'm not sleeping, not sleeping, not sleeping at all. Everybody is talking about important issues. They are talking about very important issues. Very important issues are VERY important. But I , I'm just sitting, just sitting and looking at the courtain. That's vain. Tha't so vain. I piss on their important issues.

Night and everythang in Home & Family JoeUser Forums

Yes,yes, yes. Everything is changing face. Definite ending of pretending. For what. For whom. I'm growing, and don't care in which direction,in my direction.Only this is important and worth something, in my direction,doesn't matter, good or bad. Mine, mine. You can talk shit to me, whatever you want, you can restrain me, mentally, economically, emotionally,

After few months in Personal Relationships JoeUser Forums

I can't even think. I can't even think about it. I can't believe it. I have to make rituals to make it gone. 3 months passed. 3 months like 3 centuries. Everything has changed, everything has changed. The pain is like the air, it's normal. Something sweet and warm prevents me from sleeping. I can't sleep, I can't sleep without a word, without a word FROM YOU!

Obsession in Personal Relationships JoeUser Forums

I can't stop. I can't stop. I need it. My inner emptiness requires it. This is her fault. Only her. My emptiness. I don't believe in that, but I need it. This poison is my cure. I will give you my soul. Just look at me. Your body means nothing to me. I need you everywhere. You will never know about it , because it is a shame. My proper existence

Bad in Blogging JoeUser Forums

I hate this week of disappointment. I hate this week of disappointment. I hate this week of disappointment. I hate this week of disappointment. I don't have any plans. I don't have any plans. Nobody between nothing. I need your bright soul. I need it. I need you. I shouldn't . Everything I shouldn't I need. I hate this week , I hate it. Thi