fantastic camera work, some of the best ive seen from Sins, however the jumping between soundtracks with each scene change was horrible and should have been easily overcome, you lost major points for that
and the crappy subtitles you put at the bottom just ruined it... "But there is this empire... that did these things with these ships and then like, omgosh i dont know, like, this person just did that thing and it was way cool... and its time to bring in the big guns..." and thats it... seriously... really shit
so, 11/10 for camera work and what you recorded (though some combat between your empire and theres could have gone a long way)
2/10 for music
-15/10 for the crappy subtitles
nonetheless, good work and keep trying