Is it normal to suck at first?
Even on normal the AI is pretty decent. It seems like they always go for the one aspect of my civ that I was neglecting. If I try to out-tech them, they attack. If I try to attack, they manage to hold me off long enough to out-tech me. If I'm turtling, they wear me down slowly. If I'm moving quickly they invade planets while my attention is on something else.
I've watched the tutorials, so I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. Usually the first few things I do are colonize any planets I actually have a chance at colonizing, then specialize one planet in research, one in industry, and one in economy, if I have three. Then as soon as I can reasonably get a constructor out I build a military starbase next to my original colony. After that I'm mainly just teching up and building ships.
I guess I just don't know how to make my strategy come together.